The title is from Romans 7:19-21, and while I do not intended to discuss that verse here (many more learned men and women have done that all ready), it does come to mind when I do something that I find irrational or inconsistent.
This is likely far too philosophical an opening for what I am actually talking about. I am talking about buying a video game. Gotham Knights, released back in October of 2022 and derided by most critics for its technical flaws and repetitive game play. I knew about all of this when I bought the game, but I bought it anyway. Why?
For one thing, this is not precisely the same game that was released in October. It has undergone several updates to patch the technical issues and runs considerably better than it did then. Even on Steam Deck, it maintains a mostly playable framerate. Mostly. For another thing, it was cheap. It launched at $70 on consoles ($60 on PC, where the $70 price tag has not yet become quite as common), but I got it for $20 on sale. That’s pretty decent savings even though the poor reviews have driven the price down seemingly on a monthly basis and it will likely be even cheaper in the not too distant future. And for still another thing, I like the Batman universe. Bats is dead in this one (it’s really, really not a spoiler; it’s the whole premise for the game), but you still get to play as Batgirl, and Nightwing. And maybe Red Hood and that other geek playing Robin now. Tim Drake I think his name is. Or maybe that’s Nathan Drake’s Brother. Oh and the story is based on the Court of Owls arc from the comics, which is pretty great (though Bats is decidedly not dead for that one).
So those are all reasons why, or at least the ones I told myself. The repetitive gameplay hasn’t been fixed though. It’s an open world game and has a very bad case of open world bloat and most of the tasks you are asked to completed are the same over and over again. Stop a bank robbery. Stop an Armor Car heist. Save the hostages. Defuse the bombs. (These happen with such frequency it’s a wonder that a) any part of Gotham is still standing, and b) there isn’t a shortage of armored cars or bombs.) You get slightly different missions for each playable character, but they all boil down to the same thing. Go to a marker, beat up some guys, grab a thing, repeat. It’s the opposite of the fun a game is supposed to be. It bears repeating that I knew this going in. So, why buy this game?
Doing research into the psychology of why, I came across an article in Psychology Today which suggests that “Everything we do is connected to our wants.” Wants govern every small thing we do, whether purely instinctive or intentional. You want your house to remain neat, so you clean it. You want to feel rested and refreshed, so you sleep. You want to learn a language, so you practice it. So if that’s the case, what, by buying this game, did I actually want?
That’s a harder question to answer. Was I bored and just wanted a distraction? Did I want that dopamine rush you get from buying new things? Did I want to play the game all along? Did I want the reviews to be wrong? After some consideration, I think the answer is yes. Not yes in the sense I’m being cute and purposely not answering all the question, but yes as in all of the above. In essence, I wanted to experience it for myself, but also, I wanted to will my wants into reality, no matter how irrational that might seem .
Now here I am, over a month later, having played the game a grand total of 10 hours. That’s not for a lack of playing games. I’ve rolled credits on two other 20+ hour games in that time frame and played several other games besides those. I don’t want to say I’m necessarily done with Gotham Knights, but it’s 100% accurate to say I became distracted and placed it on the backburner. Gotham Knights did not drop in price in that time frame, though so I still feel like I got solid value for the $20 that I spent. It’s easier to be forgiving of a game you didn’t pay full price for, and I did actually enjoy a couple of the story missions involving the Court of Owls, while finding many of the complaints about how the game is structured to be accurate (all the the characters have abilities that are unique, BUT, Batman had all of the same abilities in one character in the previous Arkham games and everyone in the new cast now feels watered down). Overall, I could have done better by purchasing the game when it got even cheaper, but it’s not the worst game I have purchased either. I wouldn’t recommend it for non Batman fans. But for fans at $20 or below? Ehh, sure, as long as you know what you are getting into.
This previous paragraph has convinced me the decision was potentially not so irrational after all. I read reviews first, I waited for a sale, I kept my expectations in check. And yet I feel some guilt because I can still see the same irrationality, the same justification in other areas of my life and maybe in those instances, it’s not as okay. Maybe people would say it’s fine. And maybe it’s okay for them, but not for me. Maybe I’m overthinking it, or maybe I need to take a different tack.